No distance too far for love

"Children's children are a crown to the aged, and parents are the pride of their children."

My parents, who have been in Portland for 2 months, left for home yesterday. They are back in Illinois reconnecting with the other grandkids and sorting through lots and lots of mail. I miss them already. We all miss them. Gram was extra sensitive and a bit fussy yesterday. He wanted to be held a lot and wanted us by him while he played. I interpret that as missing Meme and Papa. He doesn't understand quite yet what the goings and comings of people mean. But he knows Meme and Papa. And he LOVES them.

It was so fun over the last 2 months to see Gram's relationship with my parents grow and evolve. At first, when they would arrive at the house he would continue to play or would crawl over to me, still unsure of what was going on. By the end of their trip, the minute they walked in the door he was crawling over to them, lifting up his little arms wanting to be held. He was not only reaching out to be held by Meme, but also Papa! One of the sweetest things I've ever seen was my son wanting to cuddle up with my dad...priceless.

And what an amazing feeling to see my parents absolutely delight in my child. There really is nothing like seeing someone love and delight in and cherish your little one. It warms my heart, it fills my soul, it reminds me that no matter what happens in life, I know Gram will be taken care of - all of his needs will be met, he will be provided for and he will be loved, that's all a girl could ask for.

Someone said to me upon seeing Gram and I for the first time in months that she could tell from his countenance that he was content and felt safe and was at peace. Yes!!! I can attribute some of that to having grandparents that love him. Being able to interact with older people who he can trust, people that he doesn't get to see on a regular basis, is so formative for my son. He is learning that out of sight isn't out of mind or out of love. That just because someone leaves doesn't mean they won't come back. That there really is no distance that's too far for love. Such a great lesson at such a young age.

We miss you Meme and Papa!!

Read More 2 comments | Posted by Kelli Bagby

Happy Birthday Gram!

A year ago today I met my son for the first time. (Wow, beginning this blog post is bringing tears to my eyes!) I will forever remember that moment (thankfully Dustin captured it in the picture above which helps the ole' memory). I am still in awe of the fact that he grew inside of me, that the little person in my arms above was living in my belly, that I "knew" him before we had officially met, that he knew me literally from the inside out.

It is an amazing experience to carry a child, to give birth, and to begin to fall in love with this little being who has altered your life forever. People talk about how much a child changes your life, how everything you know is different after you hold that tiny bundle of joy. What I didn't expect was how much I would be different. I am not and can no longer be the old Kelli. It's impossible, because I now have this incredible new relationship in my life, a person that consumes so much of me. I can't be self focused like I use to be, I am a new me. I feel like a year ago today, 3 new people were born, Dustin, Gram and myself were all born new that day. And every day since then we have been learning who we are in relation to each other. It has been the best experience of my entire life.

I looked at Gram this morning as he was playing with birthday balloons and got a bit choked up. He is just so much more than I ever dreamed. He is more wonderful, more quirky, more funny, more sweet, more cute, more smart than I had imagined. I love every day with him. Not every day is fun and easy, but every day is good. So, so good. I cannot thank God enough for not only giving me this little man, but allowing me the opportunity and desire to stay at home with him. To have so much time with him, I just love it.

And everyone was right, the time goes by so quickly. I don't think I've learned as much or grown as much in such a short amount of time before. Some of things I have learned this past year are:

1. Time really does fly by, whether you're having fun at the moment or not.
2. To enjoy those precious moments with Gram, whether at 3am or 3pm, because they don't last long.
3. Apparently, I don't need 8 hours of sleep a night! For a whole year!!
4. Gram's laugh brightens even the darkest moods.
5. Dustin is the fantastic father I knew he would be.
6. I need God's help every day to be the fantastic mom I want to be.
7. Girlfriends are like morning coffee, you gotta have them regularly.
8. My body will never be what it use to be.
9. I understand my parents so much more now that I am a mom. I want to love my children like they have loved theirs.
10. A healthy marriage is hard work, especially after having a kid, but worth the effort and the most important aspect of a healthy family.

Gram, you have changed our lives forever. We gladly accept that change for you my sweet boy. Thank you for being patient with us as we learn how to love you and care for you. You are a gift from God, entrusted to us, a responsibility we do not take lightly. We are here for you always and will always, always delight in you. Happy birthday baby, i love you.

Read More 2 comments | Posted by Kelli Bagby

That they truly know me

"But those who wish to boast should boast in this alone: that they truly know me and understand that I am the Lord who demonstrates unfailing love and who brings justice and righteousness to the earth, and that I delight in these things." Jer. 9:24

My heart's true desire is wrapped up in this verse...to truly know and understand my Lord. To not care about boasting in anything else, but Him alone.

The unfortunate thing is I spend my days focused on boasting about other things. The way I prioritize my time would seem to reflect that I care more about boasting about being a good mom, a good wife, a hard worker, an intelligent person, a multi-tasker, a housekeeper, a wise financial person, a cook, a crafter, a friend, a blogger. All of these things so easily crowd out my heart for the Lord, or so it seems. All of these things are good things, but without God as the center they inevitably end in disappoinment, a weary body at the end of the day, wondering if it's worth it, pride in my busy days, a look-at-me attitude.

I have said before that I don't want a busy life, but a full life. I think that's the difference in where we boast. Boasting in ourselves leads to busy lives, full of stuff that make us feel important. Boasting in the Lord leads to a full life, days centered around knowing the Lord in whatever that day may hold.

Lord help me to truly know you today, to understand who you are and who I am in you.

Read More 1 Comment | Posted by Kelli Bagby

No distance too far for love

Happy Birthday Gram!

That they truly know me

kelli-girl

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