A few years back I read the book, "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. I read it while dating Dustin and it was great to help us understand how we both best communicate. It's a great book to read for any relationship wheather family, friend, or significant other. The way people give and receive love is a huge part of who they are. Knowing the way your significant other communicates love will go a LONG way in a marriage!! I have just been reminded of this while driving to work this morning. It dawned on me as I was enjoying the beautiful sunny, no-clowd day that I was wrong about how I communicate love. Just to get everyone up to speed, the five love languages are as follows:
1. Physical touch
2. Quality time
3. Gifts
4. Words of affirmation
5. Acts of service

Mr. Chapman says that we all communicate through each of these languages, but each person normally has one or two ways that they communicate most. I had previously thought that my primary love languages were physical touch and quality time. However, the revelation this morning informed me that my love languages are physical touch and acts of service. I feel like such an idiot for not realizing this sooner!! My whole life I have been taught that love is serving others. My whole family, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. all communicate love by helping each other. I have always said that I could count on my family for absolutely anything. That is what I love and appreciate so much about my family, they show love by serving others. My grandmother Martha Jean is the greatest example of this. I've never seen a woman so determined to love God and others by serving them.

All this to say that I now understand why Dustin calls me a princess when I'm around my family, my parents especially. They do whatever I want!! I can ask anything (almost!) of them and they will do it. Why? Because they love me!!! I like to think that they could ask anything of me and I will do it as well. That's the kind of friend I try to be. One that can be counted on for anything. That's the type of wife I try to be. I love serving Dustin. I enjoy getting him a drink, or helping with his sermon, or giving him a massage, or doing whatever he needs me to do.

The reason that this is such a revelation to me is now I understand why when I ask Dustin to do something for me and he says no or is hesitant my feelings get hurt. In that moment I can't understand why he wouldn't do something for me, knowing that I would do anything for him. In that moment I don't see anything else in the situation, such as other factors that might be affecting his decision, I only see my husband having a choice between loving and not loving me. Of course his thoughts have nothing to do with whether he loves me or not. He knows full well that he loves me and I know full well that he loves me, but in that moment I don't feel it.

I can't tell you how elated I am to realize this. I honestly feel like such a fool for not seeing the obvious sooner. Dustin and I have an amazing marriage. And this realization will only help to prevent future bumps in the road. My understanding of myself will help me to not falsely accuse him of not loving me and will help me to see the many other ways that he does show his love for me.

I highly recommend everyone married and dating couple to read this book and talk with your mate about your love languages. It is an extremely beneficial eye opener.

Dustin and I have committed to read through the bible in one year. We even got a One Year Bible to assist us in this process. It’s going well so far, I highly recommend everyone to try it. It’s nice to do it with Dustin for accountability and also so we can talk through what we’re reading which helps it to sink in instead of going in one ear and out the other. It also helps to be married to a seminary student. I expect him to have all the answers, sometimes he does and sometimes he doesn’t. The worst, however, is when he knows an answer and won’t tell me. Instead he makes me research it myself. Can you believe that??? I simply cannot.

Proverbs 2:16-22
“Wisdom will save you from the immoral woman, from the seductive words of the promiscuous woman. She has abandoned her husband and ignores the covenant she made before God. Entering her house leads to death; it is the road to the grave. The man who visits her is doomed.”

I read this passage a few days ago and was hit by its bluntness and complete truthfulness. I don’t know what’s going on in the world, but sometimes I feel like adultery is all around us. Dustin and I have learned of a few different friends/ acquaintances who are in the ministry and have wrecked their lives because of adultery. It’s sad and painful and unbelievable. It hurts to see a happy marriage and beautiful families completely torn apart because of a stupid choice. It may have only been an instant, but that’s all it takes for us to sin and completely ruin everything that we had worked so hard to get. I am reminded that absolutely no one is immune from this temptation, including Dustin and myself. I am convinced that only by God’s help are any of us able to remain people of integrity. I try every time I think of friends or family who are married to say a quick prayer of protection for their marriage. I ask that you do the same for Dustin and I.

Dustin and I have finally got a gym membership to 24 hour fitness and i can't even describe how excited I am. They were also having a deal where you get five 25 minutes personal training sessions for only $55, what a steal!! So Dustin and I have signed up for that too. Today was our first day with the personal trainers. I met my girl at 6pm and talked through a lot of stuff like nutrition, goals, etc. She measured me in every and somewhat odd areas and gave me my body fat percentage. I am mortified to reveal it here, so I press on. At 6:45pm I attended my first class at the gym (also included in the membership), hip hop!! And it kicked my arse!! My legs are going to hurt so much tomorrow. My face was the color of a tomato b/c I was so hot. But I loved EVERY SINGLE MINUTE of it!! I miss dancing so much (I'm sure many friends will be teasing me about revealing that yet again), but it's true. I am even more elated that I can take "free" dance classes with this new membership. I have never in my life been more determined to become healthy. Every area of my life needs work and I am excited to know that I will one day be skinny. Skinny Kelli has been stuck inside of bigger Kelli for too long. NO more I say, "No more!" she screams. Other classes I will be trying out include 24 Aqua, 24 step, Dancer's workout, Pilates, and Yoga.

What I learned today was:
- Women who are eating 1700 calories a day are gaining weight. Women must eat between 1300-1500 to lose weight.
- Building muscle is where most of the weight loss comes from. So don't just focus on cardio and forget the weights.
- It's better to warm up on cardio for 5 minutes, then do a 30 minute weight set, then do the rest of your cardio.
- I need to keep a food journal for accountability and to realize what problem areas might be.
- I need to eat 5-6 meals a day in order to lose weight. John (see below) explained it like this, if a Sumo wrestler eats 1 meal a day and a body builder eats 8 meals a day, most people wanting to lose weight and remain fit need to eat 5-6 meals a day. Makes sense.
- I can expect to lose 1-2 pounds per week, which means I can lose 20 pounds by the end of April!!!!!
- There is hope for everyone!! John was the 'sales' guy who signed us up for our membership and he use to weigh 681 pounds!!! Can you believe it!! He's now around 300 and looks great. He's kind of the poster boy for 24 hour fitness. What I love about this membership is that it wasn't a skinny-from-birth little thing trying to sell me a social club. John was serious about helping us to change our lifestyle and have a higher level of life because of it.

I finally feel like the pieces are in place to make changes that I have wanted to make for so long.
I am so thankful that I have a supportive husband who is in this with me and who has never judged me, not even once. I don't know how women live with men who are critical of their weight. I say, "look at your beer gut and love handles and then you can talk to me!" My next personal training appointment is on Saturday and I wish it was right now!!

On the last note, all of my peeps out there who struggle with their weight just like I do, I must encourage you to look into whatever you can to make a change. It is worth it, your life is worth whatever money or time or inconvenience it might be. I love you, and I want you to be healthy and happy, so go, go, go!!!

I have been rereading the Harry Potter series and am struck again by the simplicity of the story. It’s a story about good vs. evil, courage, friendship, wisdom, growing into oneself, I could go on and on. I assume that everyone who has read the books loves Dumbledore. He is the older, wise voice that guides and encourages Harry to do what is right. I was struck by something that Dumbledore said to Harry about Harry missing his deceased parents. He said,

“ You think the dead we loved ever truly leave us. You think that we don’t recall them more clearly than ever in times of great trouble? Your father is alive in you, Harry, and shows himself most plainly when you have need of him.”

For all of us who have lost someone close to us, these words brings tears and comfort. Knowing that those we have loved still matter helps us to get through one more day. Knowing that in those hard and troublesome times that we are not alone helps to take the fear of the unknown away. There’s a physical finality in death, but not a spiritual one. A person who dies isn’t gone completely, their memory lives on. We can’t forget their laugh and stories and frustrations and friendship and love. What would be the point of any relationship if they were erased from our memory upon death. It’s an injustice, I believe, to forget those who are no longer living in bodily form. The justice is not in dwelling on the past, but in recognizing every individual who has touched our lives whether living or dead and using what we learned from them at just the right time.

A typical conversation of Dustin, a seminarian, and his wife.

Dustin: "So I read the dictionary today and it's soooooooooo good!"
Kelli: "Um...the dictionary? You read the dictionary?"
Dustin: "Yeah, the theological one. In fact, I even read more than I was suppose to because it's so fun."
Kelli: "Um...the dictionary? You read more than you were suppose to b/c it was 'fun'?"
Dustin: "Yeah, I might read the whole thing even though it's not required. I wish I could get the other two that go along with it so I could read them too."
Kelli: "Um...so you're wanting to read 3 dictionaries?? Who are you?"

I am officially married to the biggest nerd ever...sadly, that's what I love so much about him!!

So, I ended up having the whole day off. Dustin went into work early because the video store was so swamped today, obviously I wasn't the only ones who stayed home from work. Dustin and I took a walk around the the neighborhood. A lot of people were out and about enjoying a brisk walk like us. The streets are filled with fluffy snow. We even saw a lady getting around on skis!! It's been so long since I've seen this much snow. It really is so beautiful.

I was awoken this morning by a phone call from my boss saying that we weren't opening our office until later in the day due to the weather. Barracaded in our warm and dark "dungeon", I couldn't imagine what he was talking about. So I ran to the door, through it open, and exclaimed, "IT'S SNOWING!!!" And it's beautiful!!! Very cold, but so gorgeous. Dustin is in the shower now and we'll soon be playing in the white bliss! Pics to come!!

This is a picture of my mom in line at the Tillamook Cheese Factory for her 2nd helping of ice cream!! I have never met anyone who can guzzle ice cream like my mom. I'm very proud of her!


This is my parents and us at Henry's Tavern for dinner on New Year's Eve. Dustin and I love Henry's so much, it's probably our favorite place to dine in Portland. Mainly because it has the most expansive beer menu we've ever seen. And everyone knows how much Dustin appreciates good beer.


I welcome the new year and another chance to do things right and have fun in the process.

I have been rereading the Harry Potter series because, well, living with Dustin it would be impossible not to. Dustin is reading the series for the first time and absolutely loves it, as I knew he would. So, a typical day in the Bagby house contains phrases such as, "That bastard Malfoy! What's his problem!" or "Why doesn't Harry just tell Dumbledore what's going on?" or "Don't you love living at Hogwarts?" (as if we do). We are completely immersed in Harry Potter lingo and culture, it's pretty funny.

Thank you to Jamie Simkins for introducing me to the new Cinnamon Dulce Latte at Starbucks, WOW!!! SO GOOD!!! The frapucinno is even better. This could get dangerous.

Has anyone know or studied about alkaline verses acidic foods? I have looked online and I'm getting some conflicting results as far as which foods fall into what category. I am trying to eat more alkaline foods because I was told by the lady that gave me a facial it would help with my skin and also because I think it will help with the stomach problems I've been having lately. Any information would help.

I spent last Saturday at the spa for 5 WHOLE HOURS!!! It was incredible. The best mother-in-law in the whole world got me a gift certificate for Christmas and I decided to indulge in the Ultimate Relaxation Package which included: 1 hour massage, 5 step facial, manicure and spa pedicure. So relaxing and so much needed after the last 2 months. Thank you Deb!!

Dustin and I purchased our tickets to Illinois for April 26- May 7!!! We are super excited to see friends and family. So all of you who live in the Midwest area, prepare yourself for Bagbyfest 2007!!

Dustin and I watched 2 old Bond movies last night. After seeing the new Bond movie and loving it so much, we've decided to watch all the Bond movies. So we started with the first one ever made, Dr. No, and were pleasantly surprised. It's hard to know with old movies how cheesy they will seem to us. There were some cheesy parts, but overall, a really great movie. We then moved on to Pierce Brosnin's first Bond movie, Goldeneye. It was also a great flick. We couldn't help laughing all night long at how much Austin Powers spoofed Bond movies, so funny!! After watching all the Bond movies, I think we'll rewatch the Austin Powers' movies to compare some more.

I've been feeling kind of lazy lately. Not really wanting to cook or clean, but rather just lay around and watch TV or read. I don't know if it's because I still don't feel 100% from my illness, or the crash after the high of Christmas. Whatever it is, sorry to my husband for being a lazy wife. I promise it won't last forever (maybe just another few weeks!!)

A few pictures of our holiday escapades!
This was our Christmas center. This was the biggest tree that would fit in our apartment, cute but sad!















Dustin and I with the scary big foot guy at Camp 18, a cool log cabin restaurant. I should have got a picture of the center beam of the restaurant, it's HUGE!!!















A handsome man gazing out to the ocean!!




















My parents on the path down to the beach. The coast is so beautiful and rugged in Oregon, gorgeous!

I agree with what I've heard from many others, the holidays were kind of weird this year. For me I felt like I wasn't able to truly enjoy the Christmas season because I was running around all the time. I had to hastily shop for friends and family which I hated. I love being able to leisurely look for that perfect gift but I just didn't have time. I love enjoying the shopping madness and I love Starbucks at Christmas. There was one morning where I got to enjoy a peppermint mocha frapucino with my husband and it was a great morning.

What made Christmas even weirder was that I got sick. On Christmas night I started throwing up and didn't stop for 8 hours. So our Christmas was postponed a few days until I was feeling better. The doctor put me on a liquid diet for two days and told me to stay home from work until Jan. 2 so that was an unexpected but much needed break from work. I stayed in bed for 2 days before I was able to venture out for short excursions.

However, the best part of Christmas was that my parents came to visit for 10 days. They are flying out right now as I type this. I am so thankful that they were here to help take care of me while I was sick. And I'm even more thankful that I started feeling better so I could really enjoy them. I will be posting pictures soon of some of our adventures. I love that my parents are also my best friends. They are amazing people and I just love being around them. I miss them already. As I get older it gets harder and harder to say goodbye to them. I'm not for sure if it's because I appreciate them more and more each year, or that I feel increasingly more like I need their love and wisdom to help me with life, or that I see us all growing old and I want us to be together forever. Whatever it is, it's hard to be away from them and I look forward to another visit soon.

All in all, I am ready for 2007. I am excited about work and all the opportunities and challenges that are before me. I am excited to be living in Portland and enjoying this chapter of my life with Dustin. I am excited to be meeting new friends and keeping in touch with amazing old friends. I am excited that I am alive and healthy and month by month our bills are paid. I am excited to know God more this year and thankful for his grace which I will use desperately yet another year. What are you excited for in 2007?