I assume it's only appropriate to reflective upon the close of each decade of your life. I owe atleast that to my 20's. Last night as I was going to sleep, I had some good reflections. They were eloquent in my head and yet right now I can't seem to recall any of it. Dang! I hope this isn't the first sign of how my 30's will go. I digress.
Let me begin by saying my 20's were fantastic. A lot of milestones over the last 10 years- graduated from college and graduate school, moved out on my own, followed God to Florida, learned the ins and outs of coffee and pastries, spent A LOT of time by the pool, lived with my very best friend Jaime, ministered together with Jaime, met the love of my life, dated the love of my life in New York City of all places!, married the love of my life, followed God to Portland, embraced being a pastor's wife, the list goes on and on...
My 20's were great. And yet already I've noticed the biggest change between my 20's and 30's is regrets. I lived my 20's with no regrets. Mistakes that were made were seen as lessons learned. Poor decisions and their consequences as opportunities to draw close to God. I truly felt throughout my 20's that I had no regrets in life.
I begin my 30's by reflecting on some regrets from my 20's. I feel like with age and hopefully wisdom, I'm understanding a little bit better true consequences. No, that's not it. As I turn 30 I have an overwhelming understanding of a very important truth for us all...you only get one life. Just one. One life is all I get in this world. And everything I do matters. I don't get another 20's. I don't get to redo any year of my life. I get one shot to make the most of my life, and I guess I just have to wonder if I'm giving it my best. Have I given all that God has given me my very best? At times I feel like I have given my best back to God and other times I'm ashamed to admit that I fall desperately short.
That's it. That is what is consuming my mind at the moment. So, just for fun and to distract me from pondering, let's reflect on what Kelli would and would NOT do if she could live her 20's over again.
If I could live my 20's over again, I would change....
1. Money matters - IF ONLY I had truly understood the importance of saving and wise spending. I regret not being better with my money in my 20's. Granted, I had a REALLY great time, but I also know I wasted a lot of money, and I regret that.
2. Health matters - IF ONLY I had used my metabolism in my 20's to really shed some excess weight and get in shape. I know it's still possible in my 30's, 40's and 50's but I wish I would have taken eating right and working out more seriously in my 20's.
I guess those are the big things. There are little things - you know, those situations where you acted like an idiot and wish you could just erase the memory of it forever - but there's no need to go into every one of those!
If I could live my 20's over again, I would NOT change...
1. Moving to Florida - It was definitely one of the greateast times of my life. I became friends with Dustin which ultimately led to us getting married, I lived with my very best friend, and I had TONS of visitors from all over the country come visit me, because who doesn't want to go to the beach for vacation? I miss that.
2. Moving to Portland - Also one of the greateast times of my life. I love this city and all it has to offer, I love our church and the amazing people I've got to know here, I love the whole state and how beautiful it is.
3. Following God - Although there have been tough times, times of financial uncertainty, confusion and frustration, I would never in a million years not follow God. It has been the most rewarding thing I've ever done with my life. I never dreamed my 20's would be what they were, they were so much better than anything I could have planned for my life and I owe that all to God.
Again, there are a lot of little things that I wouldn't change, like going to graduate school, ministering with Impact Ministries, taking trips to Italy, Vancouver B.C, and Lake Tahoe, attending friends' weddings, and celebrating every day life with those that I love.
So, that's it. Goodbye 20's and hello 30's. I do embrace you, 30's. You will look very different than the 20's, that doesn't make you any better or worse, you'll just be different. And I'm really looking forward to that.
kelli!
I love this post! Esp. being a girl who's 26 I'm constantly wondering
"oh crap...and I living my 20's the way I should? am I forgetting anything? I'm a living fully during this season of life?"
I love your thoughts here, and what's interesting is that
1. money
2. health
are two things I'm trying to work on. I for sure don't have these things figured out...or even what I think about them and how i should relate to these things completely. But...I'm trying to grow in these areas, and really appreciated your thoughts on them! (and the other stuff you said as well ;)